doctor, lawyer, fireman, teacher?
When you ask kids what they want to be when they grow up you get one of those 4 answers.
When I ask the missionaries that revolve in and out of my house for dinner, at least 50% give me the “I have no idea” line. Occasionally, I am impressed at some of the answers, like an Elder we had recently who was very passionate about ceramic arts. But, I also get some kind of comical responses like the Elder who said he would really like a job that “worked with the whole economy”. Trying to politely suppress a chuckle, I pursued it a little, wondering if indeed the next fed Chairman was really sitting at my dinner table, and asked if he enjoyed statistics and math, he responded with an emphatic no, he hated those subjects. Obviously, he had never shared his “plan” with any career advising adult.
I bit my lip and shoved a forkful of enchilada in my mouth to keep from launching into a passionate diatribe on the travesty which is young adult educational/career preparation in our society. (My stern motherly advice to my sons is before you go a mission you will have a good line you tell people when they ask this question at dinner appointments so it doesn’t seem like you went on a mission because you didn’t know what else to do).
While I expect missionaries to be focused on missionary work. I think having some knowledge of yourself and interests by age 21 is important– c’mon at least an idea, a tentative plan, I don’t care if you change your mind later. Really though it’s not just missionaries, lots of college students, and lots of college grads, they are all in the same boat…
Over the course of many conversations, I came to realize the fault is probably ours. We do little to help our kids decide what they want to be. For many kids when they turn 18 , they are sort of tossed to the wolves by parents who expect them to know what to do and how to navigate the system. Most young adults have no idea what jobs are even out there and well how should they? They might now what their parents do, but that’s about it. They have generally only spent time in church, school, and stores?
The problem starts with not knowing about the variety of jobs that exist, let alone what someone with that job really does, and what degrees they need to get that job. We do a disservice being “polite” and not talking about the money of it all. We need to be honest about the salary range is for a job and how that translates into lifestyle. 40 K and 400K are totally different realms. We also have to help them figure out what skills and talents they have, and what is a good fit for their personality. My vote is for high schools add a “What I Want To Be When I Grow Up” 101 class to their curriculum.
In my own experience, narrowing it down was hard, I wanted to do 1000 different things (I still do). I literally started with a list of every major the college offered and then crossed them off by process of elimination. I was torn between microbiology (ultimately axed because I am social and wasn’t sure I could hang with a microscope that much), classical civilizations/archaeology (while Latin and ancient Rome are great, the demand for someone to decline nouns is small and well there aren’t many ruins in my backyard), education (what I did and love), fine art (eek! making a living in fine art but I love still being an artist now), museum education (quite expensive with limited job opportunities), medicine (I didn’t want to be a nurse and I didn’t want to make the family sacrifices that being a physician could require).
Even for being a diligent student who really researched careers and jobs I didn’t even hear of my “ultimate job” until after I had graduated with my bachelors and teaching school. I first met a child life specialist when volunteered at a local hospital. Instantly, I knew it was the job for me. It combined my love of medicine and science with art, therapeutic activities, social psychology, counseling, and child development. I was lucky because I figured it out early on and my bachelors was a great stepping stone that led smoothly into graduate school and becoming a child life specialist. Finding that “perfect fit” neatly tied everything up in a great package and gave me a better sense of completion and fulfillment.
Still without a lot of advice along the way from parents, teachers, principals, advisers, and friends, things wouldn’t have turned out as well. So, I liberally give advice on education and careers to any young adult who wants to listen (or doesn’t). I beg them to really get to know what’s out there (brainstorm please), to ask every person they know what their job is and have them talk about it and to figure out what they love. To ask grown-ups who know them what fields and jobs would see them being successful in. My other advice is research and plan always have a plan for what comes next (you can stop, you can change, but always be heading somewhere).
I just wonder how many people fail to find that perfect fit of passion and skills simply because they no one helped them along the way or by the time they figured it out it’s kind of too late? I hear too many people say I wish I had done/known…If there is one thing I find painful it’s regrets.
So I try to do my part, we have many career discussions over our dinner table exploring exciting avenues like biological engineering, nanotechnology, green architecture, photonics. Hopefully when my boys are grown up they will find just the right thing. (At 8, 4, and 2 they ‘ve got some time).
Tell me your story. Were you happy with the educational guidance you received? Who helped you? When and how did you figure out what you wanted to do? Did you like your major, job, career? Would you do it differently if you did it over again? Are you still figuring it out? Do have plans for future pursuits on the horizons? What advice do you give?
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