I listened to Elder Oaks in his October 2006 General Conference talk - He Heals the Heavy Laden... and something inside of me is calling out for me to give the Lord complete control of my life - to trust Him completely and fully. In my case that means enjoying a short vacation from life instead of brooding over the major issues that currently seem to face me. Becoming more carefree. Living life and actually enjoying it. Sometimes I think way too much about life and, in some cases, it makes it hard to enjoy when I see things I didn't need to see or understand.
The Lord is willing to carry my burden. I just need to allow Him to carry my load - to give Him permission to help me be happy even if He doesn't take away my trials. Am I willing to allow Him more fully into my life? It may still be a while until the clouds clear and I find an eternal companion... but in the meantime I think it makes sense to just move forward. Spend time with girls and guys. Find things I enjoy and do them just because. Don't stress about falling in love with guys instead of girls - I'm not going to do anything against the commandments; the Lord will give me strength to carry my burdens even if He never lifts them from my shoulders. ... And maybe it's better that way. I think I'd rather be strong in the face of affliction instead of having all my trials disappear.
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