For most people in Utah, this past week was heavy. I have tried to think of a better term, but many people have described a feeling of heaviness so palpable that it seems to have a physical component. I have heard this from people across the political spectrum.

Last Wednesday, I enjoyed a peaceful walk on a trail that runs alongside a river while taking a lunchtime break from work. I had no idea until I returned to my office that only a few miles away, a popular conservative commentator had been brutally assassinated before a crowd of 3,000, causing chaos while I was tranquilly strolling.

Fortunately, a younger lady at my office cautioned against watching the grizzly videos that were immediately available online. So, I was able to avoid the additional traumatization that many others later confirmed as the result of watching the videos.

I knew who the victim was, but I really didn't know that much about him or his specific causes. Most of what I knew prior to his murder had been garnered from a Deseret News article that had been published a few days prior. From that article, I knew that the victim's views and approaches weren't something I could enthusiastically align myself with. But I also noted some things I thought were worthy of merit, such as his promotion of family values to young adults.

The feeling of heaviness I felt while sitting in my office that afternoon had little to do with the victim's political or social efforts. I felt such weight because this heinous crime violated every Utahn and every American. It would have felt the same had the victim held different political views.

Later at home, one of my sons, who is no fan of the victim, reported feeling heavy, sorrowful, pained, and even somewhat nauseous. I told him that these were appropriate responses to the evil we had all been subjected to. I agree with the governor, who suggested that anyone who had even a little bit of glee at the news of the victim's murder should look in the mirror to reflect on whether they can find a better angel within themselves.

A human being whose only weapons were words was gunned down in a violent, bloody manner in front of a mixed crowd of thousands that included children. Regardless of flawed rhetoric to the contrary, words cannot be equated with actual violence. It soon became clear that this evil crime was an act of political terrorism.

This is unacceptable, regardless of what one thinks of the victim's ideas. As Americans, as Utahns, we need to work together to make this kind of thing unacceptable. It needs to literally become unthinkable. Nothing like this should ever happen again.

Many who hold a variety of viewpoints have taken to social media in the wake of this assassination. Some posts have promoted healing. Unfortunately, some have promoted greater pain and division, and some have been down right nasty. I realize that many posts reflect people's efforts to process this event. But nastiness and divisiveness are the opposite of what Utah and America need right now.

Thankfully, I had an opportunity on Saturday morning to engage a little bit of healing. Weeks earlier, I had signed up to volunteer at an annual day of service that is meant to respond in some positive way to the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks in New York, Washington DC, and Pennsylvania.

Hundreds of volunteers gathered in work clothes. We were split off in groups of about 15 or so, and were sent to work on the yards of inner city homes that were in tough shape. The home to which my group was assigned was typical of the properties involved in the project. The owner was an older lady who had developed a medical condition that left her unable to care for the yard, which had once been a beautiful showpiece with lovely features.

Our group ranged from eight years old to people in their mid-sixties. It is difficult to describe how incredibly overgrown the yard was when we arrived. One large dead tree had been cut down. Its remains needed to be hauled away. The vegetation in the backyard was dense and was many feet high. The front yard wasn't much better.

Over the next three and a half hours, everyone worked hard on that property, filling a large construction dumpster. We kept packing it down to fit more debris. We grunted, sweated, dug, cut, hauled, smiled, and laughed together. Political and social differences faded into insignificance as we worked together. The transformation of the property was astonishing. It still needs a lot of work. But the heaviest work is done. Two young neighbor girls stood on the sidewalk in front of the house, gawking. One said, "Look, you can see the house."

We prayed together with the homeowner before departing. Many of the volunteers kept remarking at how much better they felt inside while doing this work. I kept reflecting on something JRR Tolkien said, a quote that was enshrined as deeply meaningful lines spoken by Gandalf in Peter Jackson's film adaptation of Tolkien's book, The Hobbit. Tolkien's original quote:

"Some believe it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. It is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love."

We can't always thwart great evil, such as the terrorist attacks of 9/11 or the political terrorism of last week. While collaborated efforts are certainly needed, activism against evil has its limits because it focuses mainly on forcing external change from the outside in.

Service unselfishly rendered for the benefit of others fosters positive change from the inside out. You feel good because you are being and doing good. The good that is done is contagious, as are the good feelings you experience. Researchers know that those who see someone serving others is much more likely to serve others within the next few hours. Grace is a gift that keeps on giving.

The results of your service also inspire others to action. The volunteer leaders who worked with us at our service project explained that very often when they drive by a property a couple of weeks following a project, they see that several other yards in the neighborhood have also been cleaned up.

Acts of service don't have to be big or take a lot of time. While group service projects are a great way to go, small personal acts of service are perhaps more important and more valuable, since they can be done anytime and more often.

Your parents were doing you a service by teaching you to say please and thank you when you were young. It turns out that even small acts of service like these increase the good you feel in your soul, and that goodness rubs off on others. You can't avoid it.

What would happen if we all helped spread an epidemic of goodness? Who knows? Maybe someone who harbors violent hate in their heart will be softened because of your act of kindness. The grace you extend today may stop some future heinous deed.

I could choose to respond to this past week's evil with anger and vitriol. But I have personally found that responding with service, generosity, and kindness feels much better. And if Tolkien is right, it has the added benefit of doing a better job of keeping the evil at bay.

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