It sounds like great advice. With abuse in my past I know better than many that you shouldn't change yourself to impress or please another person. But the more I think about the entire meaning of that phrase, the less I like it.
Who am I right now? Well, I have a temper. I'm emotionally awkward. I repeatedly fail at charity. I often don't know the Lord's will, and I often misinterpret it. I could stand to lose some weight, certainly. I'm unhappy with my job, and not particularly pleased with the path my life has taken. I haven't accomplished any of the things I want to accomplish. The old wounds of emotional abuse still pull at times. I have a very hard time knowing when to shut my mouth. I'm impatient. Sometimes I yell. I have a hard time listening.
Now, lest you think I am putting myself down, I hasten to assure you that I am not. These are things that I know I am, and have accepted as part of my Work In Progress status. I'm sure there are bad characteristics which I haven't yet ferreted out about myself. But I have a lot going for me, too.
The point is that I DON'T like myself for who I am. I have a lot of rough edges, and could still use a good deal of polishing. I expect I probably will for the rest of my days. But I want someone who loves me for who I'm trying to become, not for who I am. I want someone who can allow me to change, to grow and adapt. And even allow me moments of imperfection and weakness. I don't want someone who puts me on a pedestal and believes I can do no wrong. That is for fairy tales and obituaries.
I am not satisfied with someone who loves me for who I am. I want someone who loves me for who I am becoming.
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